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how to keep going when you feel like giving up (and avoid burnout)

how to keep going when you feel like giving up (and avoid burnout)

Author

Dan Pope
September 01, 2023

In 2020, I fell in love.

Head-over-size-5-but-size-6-when-in-Nike-heels.

Uncontrollably besotted.

In the hauntingly eery and earth-shatteringly egregious suffocating grips of lockdown. I was a big Ol’ pudding of Bored and Distain.

Enter: Anthony Bourdain.

Tony. My hero.

I rip-roared through Parts Unknown, Kitchen Confidential, The Layover like an aggressive White Van driver at Friday 4pm hastily getting to the battle cruiser.

Tony is THE rockstar raconteur. Curious-contrarian.

Tony’s stories had a deep, dark, deliciously rich texture like a tall-chocolate Wedding cake.

Yet, out of nowhere had an icy, howling bite. A whip. crack. smack. lick you into lucid clarity. Unveiling humanity in all it’s glory and gory.

My two favourite pieces of copy all time:

“Your body is not a temple. It’s a theme park. Enjoy the Ride”. – Anthony Bourdain

“Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride.”– Anthony Bourdain

Fuck me. Just INSANE.

Anyhoo,

How to keep going when you feel like giving up (and avoid burnout)

1. Set your simple and that’s enough goal?

When I started the podcast. Bourdain was a huge Inspiration.

My goal was super simple: if I can get paid to meet the best chefs in the world and eat at the best restaurants for free. I’ve won.

Some have a goal to own a Ferrari.

Or a Rolex.

Or build the biggest brand.

Or be a PT and drop shipper in DUBAI (pass me the vom buc).

Last week, my simple goal became reality. Eternally grateful to be invited to London’s all-the-rage-right-now restaurant.

FALLOW.

The Food, cuz.

Roll up, Roll up Rudeeee boiiiiiiii - Ces’t fuckin bonne bonne. Yum Yum in my Tum Tum.

Assailing haughtiness filled my heart as I tucked into the divine. Soul submerged in the sublime.

Burger.

Soft, carbohydrate-bouncy castle bun, housed a menacingly fatty of puck of delicious beef. Little gorgeous bee stingy zings of pickles. Proper tasty.

Ribs.

Looked like some rotting slain beast boiling in the smouldering-sun, screaming-frying pan desert where vultures swarm overhead and Cowboys and Indians eat each others ears. Tasted like heaven.

Octopus Vindaloo.

A swamp of bright pungent lusciously-lurid colours. Like a melting a Bombay Sunset on warm summer night. A circus of bright orange, melting reds, folding pinks, lashing purples.

The lesson.

How to keep going when you feel like giving up?

LinkedIn tells us to get the HUGE listing. Tesco. Ocado. Be the next Vita Coco or Innocent or GU puddings.

That’s bollocks. And, probably, for most won’t happen or will take a long, long, long time.

Scrolling on LinkedIn leads to burnout and the gnawing feeling of not being enough. 

LinkedIn makes founders feel like they’re not doing enough, not achieving enough = starting hating journey = burnout.

Imagine you’re at Whole Foods sampling. 15 people are telling you how fucking amazing your kombucha is.

BUT

You nip to the crapper, have a cursory mooch on LinkedIn and see multi pack launched into a multiple multi-verse via the meta verse.

You feel like a piece of shit. That you’re not enough.

Feel like a piece of shit = increase probability of giving up and burning out.

Instead, flip the script.

Set your simple, that’s-enough goal.

Small simple, that’s enough goals = small wins = builds momentum + fun.

Momentum + fun = keep playing the game and avoid burnout.

It could be seeing your customers smile as they try your product at a Farm Fayre.

Or seeing a field sales rep unlock a listing at a Indie you’ve been going after for ages.

Or getting gassed when you receive a warm DM on Insta.

Set the simple goal. Build fun and momentum. Avoid burnout.

Simples.

2. Play Infinite vs Finite Games

As a food and drink founder, you’re going to be pushing water up hill for a very long time.

Food and Drink is a long, hard game. A proper slog.

For years no one listened to HUNGRY. I felt like giving up so, so, so, so many times.

The below graph (fuck me, I’m using graphs…what’s got into me?!) shows that LITERALLY NO ONE listened for 2 years. In October 2022 some did. A few more. Now lots do. Thank heavens.

I just kept saying to myself

Gradually then Suddenly, Gradually then Suddenly, Gradually then Suddenly

Food and Drink founders must, like I had to, learn the difference between Finite and Infinite games.

Here’s the definition I nabbed off Wikipedia #JAH BLESSSS

“finite games (e.g. football) are played with the goal of getting to the end of the game and winning, while following static rules. Every game has a beginning, middle, and end, and a final winner is distinctly recognizable. In contrast, infinite games (e.g. business) are played for the purpose of continuing play rather than to win. Sinek claims that leaders who embrace an infinite mindset, aligned with infinite play, will build stronger, more innovative, inspiring, resilient organizations, though these benefits may accrue over larger timescales than benefits associated with a finite mindset.”

Food and Drink founders playing finite games = hate journey = burnout.

Finite games = selling your brand in 5 years to Piper.

Finite games = only being satisfied when you secure a TESCO listing.

Finite games = being so focused on the future, it blinds you from enjoying the NOW.

Finite games = start loathing the journey = burnout = give up.

Instead, learn out how to play the Infinite Game.

Infinite games = there is no winner. No END goal. The goal is to just keep playing.

The longer you play, the higher chance you succeed and avoid burnout.

Infinite games allow you to take rests and not put so much pressure on your self.

This week I interviewed actor James Cosmo from Trainspotting, Brave Heart, TROY and Game of Thrones. He’s now got a whiskey brand called STORYMAN, too.

It took James 20 years of acting small shitty roles. Until, one day, Mel Gibson called him, giving him his break in BraveHeart.

Many actors would have given up after 5 years.

Why?

They were playing the Finite game.

Not James.

James played the Infinite Game.

James loved the process and game of acting so much that he kept playing. He won.

In food and drink Charlie Bigham is a wondrous example.

Charlie’s recent Bread & Jam talk was aptly titled “The first 26 years”

Charlie is loves playing the game. It means he can keep playing the game. He’s been playing it for 26 years. And is planning to play for 26 more.

How to switch from playing Finite Games to Infinite Games?

Mull over this question

Instead of asking, How do we win a Waitrose listing in Q4 next year? (finite)

*if you don’t achieve this. You beat yourself up. Start hating the journey. Burnout. Quit.

Ask yourself…

How do we keep building X brand for the next 26 years? (infinite)

Start playing Infinite games. Keep playing. Avoid burnout.

If you wannna know more read this on Infinite Games.

Now for the needy AF ask (soz)

As you know, growing this bad boi is tremendously difficult.

I’d be deeply grateful if you may plEEEEEease refer to as many friends as possible with our super-nifty-groovy-referral programme.

Annnnnnd there’s prizes

Thank youuuuuuuuuu

Have a wonderful weekend

Popey x

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